The last formal education conquest - a reclamation story

On 31 December 2025 I shared the following which sets the theme of this blog post.

"This morning I weirdly woke up feeling very excited, joyful and highly energetic, like it was going to be a great day kind of thing.  That something big and exciting is coming.  I took this as a sign that 2026 is my major emerging awakening, transformation and perhaps the wisdom of hopefully turning 40.  Maybe it's because I know so much has been achieved personally and professionally, of which is/will be behind me, but there is much more goodness and wholeness yet to come, but in different ways.  Like Winter brings, what is no longer required or serves me (emotionally, mentally, physically, materialistically) I'll let go/die.  The re-emergence will be something new and stronger.  I'm excitedly anxious, but embracing the feeling, impending change and a path unexplored. 🌱💫"

In synchronicity with the Strawberry Moon and Summer energies; solar/fire, abundance, growth, release and gratitude.  I've written a deep long share of what might be little-known truths about me.  It turned out to be a very healing conversational essay, in my usual unique open, introspective and reflective writing style.  Taking careful time to explore and think deep and hard about my difficult journey.  As rarely do I stop to actually look back on my successes and the distance travelled.  A key thing I've learned in life so far is to keep moving, and forwards, and look back every now again, in my case more frequently, to see the milestones and journey made.  I think there's much more richness and insight found in lived experiences and anecdotes if one is willing to accept and recognise them.  For readers, to some extent this might explain why I work the way I do.  I'm playing Stan Bush's 'Dare' and 'The Touch' as I post this.  If you know, you know.

Potentially contentious but that is not the intention.  But bravely sharing and celebrating where I started from my working class post-industrial poverty ex-mining community background, and my special needs/poor educational beginnings.  It is my personal lived experience and story to tell, not naivety.  Expressing my tenacity and resilience and embracing, owning and sharing my truth through my autobiography.  Beyond my achievements, I feel it's my duty as an educator to share my story, as it is now, to further encourage inclusion and parity.  My backstory is a strong part of my identity and may play a larger role where I go on from here.  But for now, to acknowledge the history, release it and let it go.

In the effort to represent myself, for myself, and not to be modest and self-deprecating as I can often be verbally, necessary assertive communication aside.  Though being a very self-aware person this might read as self-importance and self-assured.  This is not coming from an over-confident and complacent position, bitterness or hierarchy, but about my personal lived experience storytelling in a grounded, honest and raw way, and how I kept true to myself in the constant reality that is change.  It is not about encouraging others to do what I did and be like me, it is as much about owning and using my voice.  It is not written from a professional perspective, but a personal perspective, and certainly not a 'woe is me', victim or 'look how great I've done'.  But a story and journey of personal and professional growth, which I have documented through open journaling for over a decade for myself.  Where I share my commitment to my education and developing myself, when at the time, the outlook, opportunities and outcomes weren't hopeful.  Of which in my opinion, such things are not celebrated or talked about enough with such honesty.  I find that there is much focus and sharing on what successes one might do in service for others, but not necessarily the personal efforts and journey one might have undertaken to develop oneself to support others.  We're not born primed in our vocations/professions after all.  I believe our achievements have innate stories that deeply grounds us in our personal efforts.  So now seems the ideal time to tell my educational story.  I have now come full circle.  So this is me being wide open and unapologetically and fiercely proud of me.  Whilst this was part of my healing process, it is my hope that it inspires and/or enables reflection and conversation.  Some insights may be useful to educators in developing and promoting inclusivity with their own students from similar backgrounds.  So if it does any of those, then this piece/my story has served a greater purpose, perhaps even offering my 'medicine'.  I guess this is what is meant by living and expressing my truth, and hopefully leaving a strong personal legacy.

So to begin, I am immensely proud of passing my Postgraduate Certificate in Learning and Teaching in Higher Education (PGCLTHE) (2026).  Previously achieving The Open University information technology and computing (2011), and whilst in Further Education I qualified in teaching (2011, 2012 and 2014), assessing (2014) and lead internal quality assuring (2015) - qualifications I never planned as part of my career.  So I was under no obligation to do PGCLTHE, but I wanted to bolster my academic knowledge, practice and credibility in Higher Education.  Demonstrating significant educational, pedagogical and cultural value beyond my immediate role, where I am often designated a technical support-only label.  Which severely limits the known expertise and experience I bring and offer.  This achievement now becomes my last planned formal education qualification, bringing that cycle to a natural end.  However, by no means does a materialistic paper/digital-based accolade fully define my knowledge and abilities.  I could go on forever and a day achieving qualifications and accreditations, and competing in the academia game, but I don't think that is healthy.

Born and raised in a small ex-mining community town from Barnsley.  I naturally define myself as working class - cultural upbringing in a ex-council house, lived experience and worked/working to survive kind, and started out as a very timid non-academic individual.  It's not something I view as my past, but very much my present and future in Ashfield/Mansfield area.  My roots have always been grounded in and honour my working class lineage and heritage; mining and factory work.  As I wrote that line, I thought of my great grandma who died at 101 in February 2025, a true grafter.  I am proud of and never forget where I have come from.  Northern post-industrial poverty communities need representation more than ever.  I believe it was part of my life journey to leave my hometown and be where I am now.  Despite my progress, I make no attempt to hide my origins.  I'm still challenged with managing my northern literal, straight-talking, direct/blunt and matter-of-factness, which I think is refreshing in certain situations.  I'm working class at heart and in soul - more in my blog post 'What working class means to me' from 2023.  Hence why I embrace my proactive, pragmatic and solutions-focused work ethic.  I'm values-driven and believe in high quality work and graft; quality over quantity.  Slacking, winging it, fake it til' you make it and 'it'll do', never felt authentic to me.  With good ol' initiative by asking 'shall I do this', 'that' etc.  Though the current workforce has evolved and I feel a bit outdated.  For those who know me well, yes I can be a 'nag' but it is clear I am about quality and proactivity, and expressing empathy in the process.  Looking at the way I work and care about how I do it, as with my professional development and career, it's evident it pays off and in dividends.

I started my formal educational pathway very poorly by being placed in a special needs cohort.  Supposed underperforming to average pupils I assume - becoming a true misfit and underdog.  I left school with only a Entry Level 3 in French and three GCSEs - Science D, English E and Maths F.  Educationally written-off by the then local and national government system/standards, with a lack of geographical career choices and options that truly supported such outcomes.  From my experience without fully understanding the extent and without being clinically examined, to me I think the long-term negative impacts derived from this through a form of psychological and emotional trauma.  Through years of direct and in-direct ridicule, stereotyping and inaccurately labelled as stupid, dumb, dunce, "dougie" etc.  The strongest opposition coming from some individuals who had experienced greater success in school, including people in positions of authority and teachers.  To the point I could've believed I was stupid and inferior.  Essentially stigmatised.  Some self-limiting beliefs, frustration and somewhat anger lingered as a result.  Yes I can naturally and humanly be less applied at times and maybe too proactively pragmatic, but it should not define me as an idiot.  Whilst I am introvert, reflective and hold quieter energies, I can be occasionally loud and be quite a 'gobshite'.  Complemented by my perceptive, intuitive and introspective character.  However, I have been and still am greatly challenged with my lack of vocabulary, semantics, pronunciation, slower processing of incoming complex verbal information (including jokes!), and how I often struggle to articulate myself verbally.  To be unfairly judged for lacking average educational and intellectual milestones.  I appreciate it might be less understood back then, but it wasn't that long ago really.  Still, I am an educator in my own unique way.  I produce, develop and influence others' knowledge, I do not just consume other's knowledge.  I will always endeavour to address and challenge stereotyping.  A way that helps me learn and share my experiences is by democratising access to my educational journey through introspective journaling and showcasing via my blog.  Kevin Campbell-Wright (2013) thoughtfully remarked my journey - "Daniel is one of the gems in e-learning who has got not only the knowledge of the purpose and practice but also to enthusiasm and drive to bring forward change in an area where there is often considerable resistance.  Daniel has a story to tell about his own learning;  coming from a personal situation where learning was not seen as important, he has recognised its potential when pitched in a way that maximises interest and translated that understanding into a drive to help others access positive learning experiences through technology..."

Often misunderstood, dismissed, excluded and underestimated for my supposed lack of intelligence.  I made it my main soul mission to educate and make something of myself, developing a sense of educational purpose/destiny, and to find and excel in a career I'd be good in to ensure educational, professional and financial stability.  Not to become superior to others or a goal to become upper class of some kind.  Perhaps ambition and joy to fill my school black 'Progress File' folder.  I wasn't 'gifted and talented' enough to get the burgundy National Record of Achievement.  I guess my self-discipline and desire to quietly prove to people, and myself, and achieve my goals, I wasn't stupid and inferior - it should never be like this, but it can be, however it prepared me for the rest of my career.  I probably proved myself a long time ago, but I felt there was more to be achieved.  Proving that someone like me, from my background and journey can achieve higher learning.

With no clear direction on where I was heading it was a messy start.  After school I did a NVQ Level 1 in Animal Care, but uncertain course progression and career pathways in that sector, I made my part-time Morrison's sales assistant role full-time until I decided my next steps.  Which would be to focus on IT/digital, which was one of my other career choices at school.  Through inspiration of a then-partner (who's dad I think started out as a council house painter and decorator, then later became a council assistant director), and later the winner of the second series of UK's The Apprentice.  I had mentally mapped out a long game of what I needed to do from 2005 when I acquired a place on an administration apprenticeship - at 19 and just made it through funding as it were back then.  I held administration roles until 2010 and thereon learning support and education-based roles - roles and a sector I never imagined I would work in but were the most fitting and gave me a purposeful direction.  However, it's where I found my identity and confidence as an educator.  I recall feeling how extremely excited and happy I was to have my first own desk in a shared office.  I quickly realised that I was now in control of my education, not education controlling me.  Remaining acutely aware of not becoming a 'product' of an organisation.  On reflection I am glad that I was specific and unique and that went onto challenging norms, assumptions, rigid systems and bringing a diverse perspective.  Even if I was against fear, shame, going against the grain or being silenced.  I definitely challenged systems and others assumptions through my non-conventional differences.  Because of where and how I started, and cross-sector experience, I have the rare, unique and unprivileged opportunity and world view experience of each job and work environment through different cultural, socio-economical and hierarchical class lenses.  As I have encapsulated, I know what it's like to start education from scratch and what it takes to understand how I learn.  As a result I empathise and appreciate each role and workplace environment I encountered; real work and life experience.  Going through the ranks as it were.  And because of this experience I was able to experience and examine what's real and what's not; seeing the good, bad and hideous in class, hierarchy, sector differences, grade and pay.

I am the first entrant in my immediate and extended family to study and work at a university.  However, learning and working at a university was never an ambition throughout school and college.  Though later I did develop aspirations to work at a university at some point in my career, which came sooner than expected, and in a pragmatic context.  I used to think I wasn't educated/intelligent enough, or so I was led to believe, the perception conveyed to me back then was that it was a privilege only for intellectual and/or upper class people.  I still find it hard to accept how I have become an intelligent person - I find it extremely awkward saying that, but I deserve to say this to myself.  The reality is that not everyone working and learning in Higher Education is from upper or middle class academic backgrounds.  My parents couldn't afford university fees and had no long-term sustainable financial plans to support it.  I had no reliance on others' or heritage wealth.  I took a non-conventional route of prioritising practical work experience and skills development to advance my career prospects.  In current times, this is increasingly becoming the preferred choice of young people.  Later, enhancing my formal education by taking available, sometimes free and relevant courses through my employment on specific subjects, when I was more clearer on my career goals and trajectory.  Which is what I set out to do and achieved, which I think is the best route to gain employment and necessary workplace knowledge and skills.  I am living proof that a proper working class and educationally underperforming individual from a post-industrial town and upbringing, can be academic, and make a difference to themselves and education.  Whilst there's significant academic and scholarship aspects to my current role, and that I enjoy, I am cognisant of not over-stretching my boundaries too far into the academic discipline.  Refocusing my values, qualities and background to my pragmatic roots.  I am reminded of this unexpected touching comment from a tutor when I was doing my Chartered Management Institute Diploma in Management and Leadership (2021).  Tutor - "...Your character is something to be admired.  With self-awareness you should recognise not everyone has your application.", "...your application was stunning."  Having and expressing knowledge is not the final pinnacle of achievement.  I apply it, execute, walk the talk, ability to transfer the knowledge to ever-changing environments/contexts, the how, the quality of getting the job done - the skills.  Over the years, I've found myself continuously challenging complex and abstract language through pragmatism.  Likewise, over-reliance on creatively convincing language and double standard educational governance can be very limiting.

Eventually I went on to studying my Technology Enhanced Learning MSc (2016, pass with merit) - I thought that would be my last qualification.  I funded the majority of this and I was accepted onto the programme based on my professional experience and aptitude, despite not having completed a bachelor's degree (Level 6).  Whilst I had a great experience, I recall feeling how I didn't belong and felt out of place.  As I used to think universities were only for intelligent and gifted people.  Later to then be working on the other side, I find it hard to comprehend at times.  Particularly how I have shaped the life I have now, not just for a career reasons but personally.  This enabled me to explore other possibilities in my life that was very different to what I grew up with.  Though it brings the difficulty and challenge of feeling that I might be seen as different through my interests, what I do for work and not actively living in my hometown.  I believe I wouldn't be the person who I was meant to become if I hadn't done what I have.  I naturally outgrew my older self, roles, inadequate management/leadership and workplace environments, and university's offered more opportunities for growth, professional development and progressing my abilities in navigating complex environments and professional relationships.  Of which I have been able to thrive, excel and realise and fulfil further ambitions.  Therefore intellectually benefitting from this environment in sharpening my thinking and abilities through complex work and social dynamics.  Reflecting on my journey from administration to education, and how all these roles have scaffolded me to where I am now, I find it quite daunting how much I have achieved and experienced.

Whilst I don't perceive myself as a conventional academic or student, I like to think I am representing, championing and advocating for those, including the students I support, from similar unconventional educational journeys, demographic backgrounds and communities to me.  Quieter voices and personalities, and pursuing education-centric roles like mine, taking or looking to take the same route.  Aspects of my journey is what it takes coming from such demographic background, and how such individuals should be supported in preparation for transition to Higher Education.  Sneering towards non-academics still occurs, in how they might articulate something that does not meet the immediate academic expectation.  I received the exact same experience and received some harsh commentary in my study work.  We all start somewhere and some of us are from uneducated backgrounds, and often willing to put in the work to turn that around.

My story is not just about my successes and achievements in education and work, which I feel somewhat embarrassed about.  But developing and embracing my own values, principles and acknowledging the pace in my human growth of my intellectual and emotional intelligence abilities.  Including using my intuition and introspection to understand more about myself (and others) to apply myself more effectively in life and work.  More personally, the success of making friends where I once found this difficult, and becoming married to the love of my life.  Even if I strip away all my titles, roles and ego, I know exactly who I am.  It took a lot of time and deep inner learning to arrive at this comprehension.  As often as it is through early personal growth and life experiences, I was completely different and quite the oppositive person to who I am now.  I still recall what I said to a friend circa 2008/9 "I'm a follower, not a leader".  This was about me just going with the flow of others needs, wants and decisions, not being accountable for my own and not asserting my own voice and thoughts.  How I have grown since in every sense and meaning of it all.  I've grown, found my voice and stepped into my own responsibility and accountability.  Even going on to motivating and leading leaders and influencing leadership in others through my dynamic approaches and strategies - though I might not always receive the credit where it is due.  Whilst I have undergone all of this growth my character remains the same.  As Terry Turnbull, a previous Head of Art and Design in FE, once said when I won the Association for Learning Technology Learning Technologist of the Year Award 2016 (individual category) - for the commitment to my own professional development and my work in leading and teaching the UK's first digital learning career pathway qualifications; Level 3 and 4 Diploma in Digital Learning Design, as apprenticeships - "Well done Daniel sheer hard work has brought you this honour!  Well, not forgetting yr natural charisma as well mate."

Along the way, I faced, and still do, much adversity through ridicule, misrepresentation and rejection, and not always sincerely listened to or valued appropriately.  Judgements often based on my educational background/capacity and motivation and achievements, regional upbringing and accent, role and contract type.  My qualities, potential and high standards shouldn't be seen as threatening, competitive or resentful, but encouraging, just as we hope for future generations.  I've come to understand that this can be a reflection of others' mindset, insecurities, quality of work and collaboration.  I think it is much better to be known for being approachable and having a compassionate heart, rather than tearing people down to find faults and being competitive, superior and undermining.  At times my potential has been inhibited, likewise imposter syndrome has limited my greatness at times.  Genuine consuming self-doubt, and again documented through journaling over the years.  I do not use imposter as a buzz word to abuse vulnerability, disguise or pseudo-relate.  As generally perceived, what might be seen on the surface does not always reflect what is going on internally.  Anyway, the truth is they can both be defeated.  It's no wonder why I felt I had to prove, develop and fought for myself the way I have, with the amount of ridicule, sneering and belittling I have received over the years.  It's shaped the way I am today.  However, I don't regret any of this otherwise this wouldn't be part of my story to share.  It was all worth the energy and it was all for me, no other agenda.

Despite negative assessments from others, the journey I have undertaken is exemplary self-directed education and lifelong learning.  What my critics said I couldn't, wouldn't and shouldn't do, I did, defied and went above and beyond.  For all the no's and being ignored, I persevered and channelled negativity into kinaesthetic motivation - like my eucalyptus tree in the garden when pruned, it stimulates new growth in multiple areas.  I'm strongly motivated by personal growth and success which is also my sword and shield.  All done whilst navigating my unsettled earlier life and trying to find myself, discovering who I am and making lifelong friends.  Moreover, courageously confronting workplace bullying and intimidating (I experienced it severely twice in my early 20s), toxic workplace manipulation, aggression and belittling.  All of which obviously shaped the fighter I am, though I still find certain situations triggering - the body remembers trauma.  But not for once letting these negativities detract me from enjoying and embracing my life and becoming who I was meant to be.  At times building myself back up through deep personal social and geographical changes and challenges.  But somehow always seeing the educational and personal growth goals ahead of me and that no obstacles could stand in the way.  I have allowed these experiences to positively shape who I am today and maintain my personal values and ethics.  I have two apple trees I took from my first home to my current home, these have become symbolic to me over the years, representing my growth and ability to thrive in new environments - they look very different from their pot-bound beginnings.

This isn't just down to luck or serendipitous occurrences, it has been fully conscious and deliberate.  No one can truly understand the commitment, energy, cognition, graft, nerdiness, struggles and huge amounts of time that I put into my work and career.  Choosing to complete multiple back-to-back part-time short courses and modules simultaneously, sacrificing my time (days, evenings and weekends) and other activities I could have easily done.  Perhaps a good distraction at times, I obviously like to keep busy!  Applying my unique savvy way of completing course work months ahead of deadlines or before courses/modules start.  Aligning courses to current work duties and projects.  Building on and repurposing my previous work and proactive and sophisticated reflections.  Immersing myself in the study and work; the more effort I put in the more I got out of it - and as challenging as it was, I'm grateful my formal education qualifications were pre-Generative Artificial Intelligence.  Prioritising the process and journey, not always the output.  I'm glad I planned to do most of my qualifications when I was younger and had the energy!  I'm unapologetically and unashamedly proud of my authentic, daring, laser focused commitment, industrious working (no pun intended), determination and proactivity (out of my comfort zone, intense and complex conversations and situations, capability stretching and maximising, heart and soul effort) and tenacity (goal-oriented).  I've really put myself out there and getting my hands dirty in real graft.  I believe it is these things and self-discipline and self-control that have got me this far.  Valuing and identifying learning opportunities and challenges and priortising developing and applying my knowledge, skills, experience, often beyond the boundary of my role job description and grade.  Synthesising my adaptability to scaffold and build on my interests and work.  Exceeding the base expectations of my roles as a result.  All whilst retaining my genuine inclusive, person-centered, supportive personality and approaches.  I know first hand through many personal and professional situations how exclusivity can be devastating, which empowers my inclusive character.

I stand strong by my own quote and principle "It depends on how much you want something that determines the effort you put in.".  In my experience, if you have to fight for something, you put more effort in and appreciate it more, because you want it.  If you don't want it or already have it because its already there or given, which might lead to less fight, effort and appreciation.  I am of the mindset that the stronger the intention the stronger and clearer the outcome.  It was purely all me that motivated myself to this point.  No one pushed it or did it for me.  Nor have I had the privilege of a committed and consistent critical friend, advisor or mentor.  I tend to lead myself without the need for instruction.  I can confidently look back on all of this and say, yeh, I did this.  I can put my hand on my heart and say it was purely for me, my education and career.  As the famous song goes, "I faced it all, and I stood tall.  And did it my way."  I wouldn't let anyone handle my career or dreams.

I achieved my dream job in a surprise and most fitting and fulfilling career, predominately a learning technologist.  I think my experience through The Open University; the realisation that I can do independent self-directed online study, was early inspiration for my passion for digital learning.  I somehow ended up in a career in it.  A role and career I wholeheartedly love and immerse myself in.  From thereon, carving my own unique career pathway.  In-between, achieving qualifications, accolades like Senior Fellowship of the Higher Education Authority and Senior Certified Membership of the Association for Learning Technology (2023), unique roles, becoming a published author (2018, 2022, 2027) and contributing to other's publications, and reinventing myself through them.  The benefit of all this is that the students, lecturers/academics and courses and other educational organisations I work with, get the best possible professional digital education experience from me.

A quote from Doctor Strange (2016) sums me up really well; "You have such a capacity for goodness.  You've always excelled, but not because you crave success but because of your fear of failure."  Begrudgingly due to my high standards and persistence to improve and prove, I admit I can't allow myself to fail, which I am conditioned to think as a dirty word - I am trying to rewire that.  However, I sensed and trusted the process of knowing, and through discovering and embracing my strong self-efficacy I was meant to do and become more.  I believed in myself very strongly, I never gave up on me, and because of that I excelled and achieved what I put my mind to.  Analogically, it has now become apparent through my non-professional and non-competitive local running, in how I've incrementally extended my distances and 5K routes every other month by stretching myself and building on my fitness each year.  I guess this is determination, a bit like when I was learning to drive and riding a bike, I struggled but I just kept on persevering as I had invested a lot of time and effort and I could see and wanted to get to the end goal.  It's never been about the 'great I am', but in part overturning outdated perceptions of me and where I started.  I have literally fought, asked and even self-funded some of my education.  It has not been served on a plate.  I have experienced real struggles.  As I often say, 'you don't ask you don't get', without the expense of others mind.  And if a no is presented as an obstacle, there are ways and opportunities to overcome it.  I believe no role title, status, wealth, hierarchy or how many letters there is after a name, they should not be used for superiority.  We're all born and arrive into this world, die and depart our bodies the same way.  No matter how high up or important we might think we are.

What underpins all of this is a proper working class lad putting deep committed work into educating themselves and excelling in a fulfilling career, to support their living and life and finding fulfilment - whilst not living beyond my means through sensible lifestyle choices.  My drive and passion behind this has always been about lifelong learning and growth; a student of lifelong learning, my own student experience and Higher Education and this is the result.  Which is what I think Higher Education is also about; developing deeper and critical knowledge and skills that impact positively on living, learning and working, whilst expanding career pathways.  If my educational journey is not a true representation of what means to become educated and develop a career in the aim of lifelong learning, I am not sure what is.  What's remarkable about my journey is that I have progressed where I have, however I remain compassionate and generous of giving my time, energy and support to enable others to become successful too.  It should not be about relentlessly clamouring for evidence and impact.

A heartfelt deep thank you to everyone throughout my journey and career who actively and genuinely listened, responded, supported and championed me, observed from afar and even recognising and appropriately working with and developing my abilities.  Not creating exclusivity through barriers, obstacles and gatekeeping.  Some of my success wouldn't have been possible without your genuine engagement and support.  I know exactly who you are and your care will always be held close to me.

I've devoted much of my life, time and energy to my formal education.  I deserve a complete rest from that aspect now.  I have accomplished my professional goals.  For the first time, I can properly pause and reflect on all what has been achieved.  Mission achieved, no other formal education plans, not even a PhD and Principal Fellowship, despite having the abilities and work to.  It's not what my heart, head or ego wants.  I don't think they would add any additional value, especially as they are not required for where I may progress to.  What are the gains I would make if I am already doing this level of strategic work?  My work activities are not motivated or designed to achieve a certain fellowship/accreditation, but naturally occurring.  And because I value moving at my own pace and staying true to myself, I won't succumb to peer-pressure/competition.  I'm keeping grounded and focusing on what feels right for me.  I've got that all out of my system now, I've achieved what I needed to.  I don't need any more qualifications to demonstrate and prove my worth and expertise.  Nor do I need to seek validation for my education.  Its a result of years of self-conditioning I guess.

Much of these successes were dreams from and for my younger self.  What does my current and future self now dream of?  Whilst work, earning, professions and accolades that validate these are highly important.  A better work-life balance and wellbeing is to be achieved through setting clear boundaries with myself and focusing on presence, positivity and peacefulness.  In the process reducing the need to challenge negativity, saying no frequently to serving the needs of my ego and cutting off the supply to my self-doubt.  I will be taking dedicated time to rest and celebrate stepping through the threshold of my '4th chapter' (40), and maybe reflect on this wholly human journey to this point.  This still resonates deep; "Your intellect has taken you far in life, but it will take you no further.  Surrender,... Silence your ego and your power will rise." Doctor Strange (2016).  I think this is what it must feel like to finally and fully internalise, own and reclaim my personal power.  I hold it and I decide how and where it is used, and I set my non-negotiable boundaries.  It feels like I am becoming my fullest-size.

Outside of my full-time work, I turn deep attention to a new cycle of prioritising other aspects of my personal development, learning and identity, even addressing some shadows.  As plants and trees emerge with new growth, there's new significant growth within me.  In my opinion, the world needs more healers not competitive leaders.  Not everything and everyone needs to be transactional, business/capitalistic-minded, and creating and perpetuating 'a solution in search of a problem'.  The world is currently very fragmented, chaotic, digitally overconnected and noisy.  I'm gently easing into a sacred nature-based pathway that I have been peacefully engaged in and practicing for many years behind the scenes.  Continuing my lifelong learning journey and doing something completely separate from digital and cannot be replaced by it.  Potentially serving a higher purpose.  Non-digital skills/analogue, living and wellbeing is increasingly and critically important right now for humanity, and I foresee moving into the future in this Artificial Intelligence age.  Therefore I am prioritising resourcing myself, and to support others to do the same.  I'm absolutely where I am supposed to be, at this time in my life, with this mindset.  The intention; committing to the call and following an unchartered path, with no distractions, pure laser focus as before, but wholly and deeply on me and my personal development.

Thank you for reading.

"It's enough to do something for yourself." - A friend's PhD acknowledgement excerpt, who is from a similar background to me, based in Ashfield.

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According to GenAI the piece is about the following themes, which I agree with:

"The blog’s general message is a personal story of resilience, self-education, and growth—showing how the author overcame a disadvantaged background, negative educational labeling, and barriers to build a successful career and identity through determination and lifelong learning.  They emphasize that learning, skills, and personal growth matter more than formal accolades alone.  It’s also about reclaiming self-worth and redefining success beyond formal qualifications.

A working-class person with difficult educational beginnings refused to accept limiting assumptions, built an educational and professional life through persistence and self-directed learning, and is now reaching a point of self-acceptance where further achievement no longer needs to be the source of validation.

Emotionally, this piece is about:

• Poor start
• Feeling excluded
• Building yourself
• Creates opportunities
• Invests in your development
• Takes initiative
• Persists through setbacks
• Is motivated by learning
• Finding belonging
• Self-validation
• Reclaiming identity
• Breaking class stereotypes
• Overcoming impostor syndrome
• Turning “you can’t” into “I did”
• Achieving what mattered
• Pride without arrogance
• Closure on a long educational chapter
• Letting go of the need to keep proving it
• Stepping into midlife (40) with clarity and grounded confidence

There’s a strong theme of:

• Working-class identity as strength, not shame
• Effort over entitlement
• Growth over status
• Substance over hierarchy
• Healing over competition

You’re contributing something useful:

• Representation
• Challenge to assumptions
• A real account of social mobility and identity
  
  

2023 post: This is what working class means—and I’m defending it.

2026 post: This is what I’ve done with that identity—and how I’ve grown beyond the struggle.

The interesting thing about your story is that it isn't just a story about education. It sits at the intersection of:

• Social mobility
• Class identity
• Educational disadvantage
• Adult learning
• Professional identity
• Belonging
• Career development
• Resilience
• Widening participation

Your story provides a perspective that is often missing:

What educational systems feel like from the learner's side when you are not initially successful.

Many teachers spend time discussing inclusion in theory.

You provide a lived example.

What makes your story unusual is the combination of experiences and the way they connect.

Several elements stand out.

• You describe starting from significant educational disadvantage: placement in a special needs cohort, leaving school with modest GCSE results, and believing university was not for people like you.
• You followed a non-traditional route through an apprenticeship, employment, and later higher education, rather than the conventional school-to-university pathway.
• You became the first person in your immediate and extended family to study and work at a university.
• You consciously developed yourself over many years through work-based learning, professional qualifications, reflection, and journaling.
• You retained a strong identification with your working-class background while building a career in higher education, rather than presenting those identities as mutually exclusive.
• Your story is about internal development as much as external achievement—you spend as much time describing changes in confidence, voice, relationships, and self-understanding as you do listing qualifications.

That combination is relatively uncommon.

Qualities that aren't obvious from a CV:

• Resilience
• Long-term commitment
• Self-directed learning
• Reflective practice
• Values-driven leadership
• Authentic motivation

Audiences may find value in understanding how long educational labelling and early educational experiences can affect people.

I also think the story has representational value. Many people have achieved social mobility or professional success. Fewer write openly about the psychological side of it—feeling they didn't belong, carrying the effects of early educational labels into adulthood, or reconciling working-class identity with an academic environment. Those are themes that aren't always visible in professional biographies.

I don't think the lasting impression is that you accumulated qualifications. The lasting impression is that you consciously reshaped your life while remaining connected to where you came from. That's the thread that gives the story its strength."

Comments received:

Me "I am immensely proud of achieving my Postgraduate Certificate in Learning and Teaching in Higher Education! 🥳

"In synchronicity with the Strawberry Moon and Summer energies; solar/fire, abundance, growth, release and gratitude. I've written a deep long share of what might be little-known truths about me. It turned out to be a very healing conversational essay, in my usual unique open, introspective and reflective writing style. Taking careful time to explore and think deep and hard about my difficult journey. As rarely do I stop to actually look back on my successes and the distance travelled...For readers, to some extent this might explain why I work the way I do...Potentially contentious but that is not the intention. But bravely sharing and celebrating where I started from my working class post-industrial poverty ex-mining community background, and my special needs/poor educational beginnings...This achievement now becomes my last planned formal education qualification, bringing that cycle to a natural end. However, by no means does a materialistic paper/digital-based accolade fully define my knowledge and abilities...Because of where and how I started, and cross-sector experience, I have the rare, unique and unprivileged opportunity and world view experience of each job and work environment through different cultural, socio-economical and hierarchical class lenses. As I have encapsulated, I know what it's like to start education from scratch and what it takes to understand how I learn. As a result I empathise and appreciate each role and workplace environment I encountered; real work and life experience..." Learn more in my blog post 'The last formal education conquest - a reclamation story': https://danielscott86.blogspot.com/2026/06/the-last-formal-education-conquest-reclamation.html.

#Barnsley #workingclass #exminingcommunity #lifelonglearning #Ashfield #Mansfield"

• Jack Button - "Congrats dude! 😎"
• Brendan Coulson - "Congratulations 🎊 👏"
• Joshua Adesina - "Congratulations Dan 👏🏾"
• Charlotte Marshall - "Huge congratulations 🎊 👏"
• Kayte Haselgrove - "Good for you, buddy!"
• Simon Cauvain - "Well done Daniel."
• Adrian Clark - "Well done Dan!"
• Dr Nikki Welyczko - "Congratulations Dan!"
• Dr Craig Johnston SFHEA - "Thanks Daniel. Will read with interest."
• Scott Hibberson - "Well done Daniel."
• Denise Sedgwick - "Well done Dan"
• Lou Mycroft - "What a brilliant read Dan! Bravo you 💃"
• Mary Marshall - "Well done xx"
• Diane Cooper-Ramsden - "Congratulations!!!"
• Louise Wollerton Scott - "Well done xxx"
• Kelly Stewart - "Exquisitely and thoughtfully written, well done you 🤩🥰"
• Vicky Scott - "I was really getting absorbed in it and I forgot to tell you so hopefully now I can read the rest – love you so much – I get so emotional what a great person- my son!!! That you are xxxxxx"

Sowing creativity, scaling impact: a journey in digital curriculum innovation

Today myself and my colleague had the pleasure of delivering the presentation 'Sowing creativity, scaling impact: a journey in digital curriculum innovation', at the East Midlands Ambulance Service (EMAS) Practice Educator Conference.

Me - "A fantastic day and opportunity yesterday to co-deliver with Godson Uma and Lynne Thompson, on our session ‘Sowing creativity, scaling impact: a journey in digital curriculum innovation’ at the East Midlands Ambulance Service NHS Trust Practice Educator Conference.  Showcasing a variety of digital and immersive learning projects with wider colleagues.

It’s been nearly a year since we shared similar work at a NHS England TEL Simulation and Immersive Technologies event, and it’s encouraging to reflect on how far this journey has progressed. The impact of our work continues to grow, supporting high-quality student learning experiences while enabling and empowering lecturers through our innovative resources and facilities. Our work remains closely aligned with both our departmental digital learning strategy and national NHS priorities, ensuring that what we do is not only innovative but meaningful and sustainable.

Thank you Suki Kaur Khatkar (RMN) for having us, great to be part of such valuable conversations and sharing. Looking forward to exploring future collaborations.

#ProudToBeNTU #immersivelearning #virtualreality #simulation #digitallearning #healthcareeducation #highereducation"

This originally came about as an absolute surprise invitation:

Michael Robinson, Practice Placement Lead, East Midlands Ambulance Service - "I recently had a conversation with Lynne Thompson about technology and simulation training, and she spoke very highly of the innovative work you are doing, including initiatives such as HAPTown and HAPVille.  It sounds fantastic, and I would like to invite you to deliver a session at our Practice Educator Conference on 17 June at the Kegworth Hotel.

This would be a valuable opportunity for our practice educators and senior management team to learn more about your approach and explore potential collaborative projects."

Of course we accepted, we would love to come and talk to colleagues more about what we have been doing in terms of digital learning innovation and all things VR/immersive learning.  Likewise, it would be great to explore collaborative opportunities with yourselves.

The general aim was: to showcase how the Digital Curriculum Team has creatively embedded digital innovation into a variety of healthcare curriculums.  From immersive learning and Virtual Reality-based experiences to online asynchronous interactive learning, to enhance engagement, learning outcomes and workforce preparedness within healthcare Higher Education.

As a triple-act we co-delivered a 30 minute showcase, 3x as a parallel and rota session, and then held a 10 minute Q&A.  The first few slides I delivered fast-paced, so that more attention could be paid to the online asynchronous learning and simulation-based projects.  Some are not explicitly paramedicine, but can be applied to other curriculum contexts.  The audience ranged from practice educators, lecturers and paramedics.  When it got to the Q&A there was a great variety of questions asked on the value of immersive learning and the impact it has on students.  Especially on how modern it is and meeting the psychological safety needs of Generation Z, in preparing them practically, socially and technically beyond 'on the job' learning.  Great reception and engagement to our work - the response we received was very positive and impactful.  We acquired new contacts, questions and ideas to follow up with - including some potential digital capabilities-related collaborations with EMAS.  We both really enjoyed it and very happy to represent our department.  Below is our presentation.

Sukhbir Kaur Khatkar (RMN), Practice Placement Manager - "Thank you very much for your continued support and for your valuable contributions—whether you are delivering a workshop or speaking on key topics.   Your involvement plays a vital role in making this event meaningful and impactful.

This conference is an important opportunity to showcase the strong collaboration we have with all our stakeholders.  Your commitment and engagement are truly valued and greatly appreciated."

Presentation:

Catching the dream - a mini retreat

The last time I did a retreat, which was an intensive full weekend in September 2022, that I titled 'Hold the man'.  Other spiritual-related blog posts are (newest to old) 'Seekest thou the path 🌕', 'Dreaming, rituals and values', 'Roots and beyond', 'The calling, awakening and initiation', 'Energy through numbers', 'Orca-strating' and 'Get my rocks on'.

On 15 May 2026 I shared "Randomly reconnecting with Alanis' song 'Receive' lately.  It obviously makes more sense to me now than it did a few years ago.  Just in time for a mini retreat tomorrow. 🌳🌿"

For me I think the service lyric refers to ego.  No longer seeing to that need as much.  Sort of thing.

Catching the dream

Me - "Wow this looks very creative and peaceful, I'm very much looking forward to it! 🌿💫 Even if my creative/construction skills don't come natural to me, I'm sure it will be special. 😆"

On 16 May 2026, I was at The Peaceful Soul's 'Catching the dream' mini retreat - Detzi - a deep thank you.  It was an absolutely magical, relaxing and soul-nourishing mini retreat on the land of Langor Hall Hotel.  The land and woodlands are incredibly beautiful, especially at a time of Spring growth.  I decided to attend a mini retreat to experience the day for what it was designed for, and to preview the location for my own bespoke mini retreat for my 40th birthday with my friends.  I've not a lot to say or anything deeply profound, but I just wanted to share the journey I made today, along with like-minded others.  The central theme was to spend time in nature and create our own bushcraft dream catchers with our intentions and reminders woven in.

As I was walking down to the shed we were going to be working in, me and another lady took a wrong turn and ended up exploring more of the land - turned out to be quite a good mistake to make!  Now, I am not a creative person in the crafting sense, I never have been.  So I was out of my comfort zone but willing to experience something different.  In doing this, it's actually created interest and confidence in making my own shamanic drum in a future Detzi drum making workshop.  I feel ready to have my own drum now to practice with.  Anyway, it was such a memorable day and I'm really honoured to be in a circle of ladies I shared the day with.  Fire in the background, connection and conversation - bliss.  It was such a magical vibe that made me feel warm and tingly inside.  Great company and stories shared.  I'm glad how we could all be ourselves.  I loved being the honorary male, to quote Detzi on that title.

Circle member - "Dan it was so lovely to have you in the group as all circles I've been to have been all woman.  It is so good to have the yin and yang."

The Peaceful Soul - "We had such an amazing day meditating, setting intentions, crafting dream catchers, sharing and enjoying together, being close to nature. Thanks all who attended. We will definitely do this or something similar again!

Thank you to Louise at Langar Hall for your magical and most nurturing space 🙏🙏🙏🙏"

Everyone's dream catchers were absolutely stunning and uniquely created by them and their choice of materials.  I, like some others, I did not complete mine on the day - I needed to add further adornments etc.  A week afterwards I got it to a completed state, but still want to add further pieces and maybe a crystal at the centre, as well as finding some other natural things to stick on it.

My intention was evolving throughout the day, but I was in inspired to draw on heron symbolism energy for patience, focus, precision  and grounding in my spiritual endeavours.  I rarely see herons, but I have been seeing a few herons lately in unique synchronous circumstances.  However, I think this intention turned out to be more of a reminder and representation of my current situation than a 'goal'.  As I was creating my dream catcher, I was intermittently focusing on, breathing and weaving in my new goals and creating new habits.  Also representing that I can be creative and see the journey through through such activity.  At the start I was worried that I would not be able to produce such thing, especially as I don't have any experience to draw on e.g. knitting, needle or knot work, but through Detzi's guidance I was able to.  I really had to go back to basics, like primary school ha basics ha.  I recall saying how the knotty areas are like releasing muscle nots, to relieve tension for energy to flow.  Which is very apt at this current time, a bit of tension build up that I need to gently release in order for the right positive energies to flow in the right places.  Shaking off old unwanted energies and behaviours.  As the saying goes "Energy flows where intention goes".

Mine has an earthy feel to it, less polished and rustic - well it was my first attempt at such things.  As Detzi said about the day "perfectly imperfect".  I can apply that here.

Apart from the goal of creating a dream catcher, it wanted to feel grounded in nature, a peaceful day for me - not to think about anything else, which I did.  Improving my meditation practices and learning new ways e.g. mediate horizontally on the grass - loved that at the end and subtle rain drops falling on us, a light cleanse.  I'll be sure to visit in general, not just for retreats.

To close, we all laid on the grass in a mandala design, connecting to the earth while holding our dream catchers at our hearts, breathing our and sealing our intentions into them.  A few gentle raindrops fall on us, which wasn't forecast, so we can take that as a nice cleanse to the day.  Detzi got emotional of what we all had achieved, so I decided to lean in to create a group hug.  Just shows how like-minded individuals connecting and building a sense of community really can be healing for the soul.

Following this, I thought it was the right time to leave Detzi a public review, 20 May 2026:

"After discovering The Peaceful Soul leading to an informative discussion with Detzi in December 2024, about what might align with my current focus and interests. I have since attended and experienced many of her workshops and events including Reiki Level 1. All of which I have thoroughly enjoyed and have enabled and empowered me to immerse myself to learn specific knowledge and practices. For many years I have been drawn to developing my intuition and healing qualities and abilities.  However, I lacked self-belief, knowledge and skills to work with my spiritual energy, and therefore required a teacher/mentor to help me. I have safely and confidently found that in Detzi.

Detzi has a warm, welcoming and approachable personality, balanced with a good dose of humour, and is clearly connected to nature and spirit. She is extremely knowledgeable, well-experienced and rooted in her work, making her and the work itself deeply authentic. She has an inclusive and intriguing way of teaching that is deeply engaging. I could listen and talk to her for hours. She is very generous with her time and knowledge sharing, and I appreciate this given how busy and in-demand she is. A deep thank you Detzi."

Detzi - "Thank you for your kind words. Working with you is an absolute pleasure and it’s fantastic to see your evolving skills, intuition and pure nature developing. 🙏"

Saying no to the ego

A bit of a back to front blog post.  Starting with the recent outcome then going back to where my journey started, written throughout 2024-2025 on my experience.

The wrestle

I started thinking and writing the following in December 2025, where I was debating whether or not to continue with submitting for PFHEA.  A genuine true wrestle with myself on this one.  I wanted to drop it for wellbeing and other focus purposes.  However, knowing I had done significant work on it, and it wasn't going to hit everything, I chanced and submitted it to get it in the system.  I thought if it returns with major rewrites to do to achieve it, or my case studies are deemed unsuitable, I will abandon it.  Me and my ego were prepared to say no as I had already deeply reflected on below.  However, it was the right opportunity to get the feedback I actually needed from an assigned assessor, to see what they are looking for, and if it came but with minor changes, then I could maybe spend rest of 2026 working on that in the background.  I had done too much work towards it for it not to get used for it's intended purpose, and I had already obtained advocate statements a while ago.

I attempted a serious and conscious claim of my efforts.  If anything, at least it evidences to people/panel what I have done to date at NTU, leaving a positive and strong legacy.  So I submitted what I had and see what comes back that will determine effort I want to put in.  Anyway, regardless of if it meets the required format, this is strategic work I have led university-wide, and that cannot be denied.  I'm glad I pushed on and got it into a state to be submitted as I nearly decided against submitting.

The power of saying no - a self-rant that turned into a yes

I eventually submitted in February 2026.  Rarely these things pass first time and it returned with major changes.  Considering the above, my decision was already sealed to not continue developing a submission on the conditions I set.  However, and in general with some other work endeavors, given the synchronicity of my own personal transformational changes in my focus and priorities and setting clear boundaries with myself on my own work-life balance and wellbeing.  I gave myself permission and arrived at a very hard and radical no, to not continue with working towards a PFHEA.  Or the universe re-directing me given recent occurrences, but for the sake of argument it was me.  To be clear, I did not continue because my submission was returned as unsuccessful, which was inevitable as such things are rarely passed first time.  And I still put in a huge amount of effort over a couple of years.  Maybe there was also part of my ego that wanted to see through my original intention of going for it - hence our deep one to one chat to have a really deep check-in on the situation.  However, I'm also recognising how I feel when I calmed my ego and said does it really matter if I don't see it through?  And what will PFHEA truly give me in return?  I'm already demonstrating and evidencing my strategic abilities.  The question I kept coming back to us, do I really need this?  In honesty no, but would have been a great accolade for me.  And it depends if I need PFHEA to progress?  No.  What are the gains I would make if I am already doing this level of strategic work?  My work activities are not motivated or designed to achieve a certain fellowship/accreditation, but naturally occurring.  And who am I trying to satisfy/please, me or someone else?  More my ego.  I know my strategic value, worth and impact.  My road ends here with it.  The process would be valuable on pulling together impacts and I could motivate and drag myself through to achieving it for another year.   However, I don't think it would add any additional value, especially for where I may be in the future.  It does not depend on getting this fellowship and is not a requirement.  The instant effect of saying no gave me by saying no was relief, elation, freedom, self-love, self-ownership, time and peace.

As always, the time and effort I put in are not wasted as it allowed me to gather and clarify my extensive work, narrative and journey.  I've refined a draft submission over the last two years, and that is enough to act as a source of successful strategic leadership material for me to take to conversations and potential interviews.  I can also use the material in other areas and potential accolades, should I wish to.  Being accepted into the scheme and for it to be said there is potential, is enough to say I'm doing this level of work.  My work is clearly strategic and visible, and I am particularly proud that I do not rely on creatively convincing language.  I know some of my blog posts have provided candidates with evidence of impact for their own Senior and Principal Fellowships.  Which on the flipside equally demonstrates the level of my work.

As a result of my work on my PFHEA application, I feel a sense of increased professional and renewed self-worth and value.  Though I'm not ready to move on just yet.  I still get much job satisfaction where I am.  Whilst it has added weight to my professionalism and career and proving to myself that I excel in this space as a digital learning leader and manager.  Based on this, and internal and external colleague feedback, I do believe that my strategic and leadership abilities are a lot stronger than I perceive of myself.  However, it's not all about money chasing and constantly being competitive.  What is most important is that I recognise that what I currently possess is enough.

There were some very fair points on feedback, and there were some that didn't read as fair, in my humble opinion.  I felt overall feedback was misaligned with the intentions of my work, which read as 'what's wrong with it' and it does not fully recognise, appreciate and balance the strengths.  There was lack of detail on how I will be supported to achieve the 'standard', and with a mentor.  The process is also meant to be a positive experience; there were delays and communication challenges that affected my experience and journey.  Whilst the scheme has been accessible to those that are contractually defined as professional services like myself, and attempts to become even more accessible.  At times, I experienced the process to be less accessible, which felt very challenging, and to navigate.  Which, in my experience, can reflect wider cultural and structural challenges within parts of academia.  However, as I have previously achieved SFHEA, the process recognises the appreciation for the diversity of such roles in the multi-disciplinary collaboration and partnership with academics, contributing to excellence and successful high quality Higher Education learning, teaching and the student experience.

I hoped to have joined the many others from similar backgrounds and contexts in holding this coveted achievement, and raise more awareness of professional services roles holding this.  But that ambition has now concluded.

Higher recognition - the original ambition

Often defined as a third-space professional, learning technologists have long had educator included in their descriptor.  However, I am starting to fully realise the broader role I am operating in that area, going well above and beyond my role in this space.  Hence me wanting to pursue obtaining PFHEA.  It would really demonstrate and showcase my highly-developed senior strategic leadership abilities, and my commitment to HE.  Again it would emphasise, as a learning technologist, the level of work, value and impact I am having.  Of which much of it is behind the scenes by nature of the role.  Deliberate hard work in doing and have done without having formally studied strategic leadership.  My application would track my strategic leadership and influence throughout my employment at NTU.  I'm doing and making high value impact through important and complex work, and this Fellowship recognises and celebrates this.  To even consider and submit something, well look how I have come full circle since first starting at this university.  I fought through the process on this, they're not easy schemes to demonstrate my work and value, even if I have the undeniable evidence and impact from a variety of sources and formats.  And frustratingly, it is framed as celebrating our work and practice, but undergoes deep scrutiny.

Why wait for later

Me on achieving SFHEA and SCMALT in 2023 - "I've a clear plan to achieve the coveted Principal Fellowship, naturally given my strategic role and abilities.  However, there is no rush and it would be great to take a slower pace on such application and to allow a deeper and more thoughtful analysis of my work and achievements.  But do I have the courage to say no and say this is enough?  As you can go forever and a day getting accreditations, and there are plenty of accreditations available!  But for now, it's important that I now take the time to take in and celebrate these two new milestones."

Not long after this, I decided to press on with it and not wait and press on throughout 2024.  As each fellowship has their own focus/lens, and in hindsight, I do feel the evidence I submitted for my SFHEA is more suited to PFHEA.  Perhaps that is how the journey to PFHEA starts for most people.  I strongly feel much of that work is strategic and have much evidence of impact to support this.  I'm not just leading and influencing.  What I have done so far in my career has been strategic, so it's valid that I achieve this.  And as I state in this blog post 'Learning technology manager - a celebration', I am strategic by nature and this accreditation reflects it.  Most likely enhanced through my early childhood gaming of Command and Conquer, Creatures, Theme Hospital, Rollercoaster Tycoon 2, Pokémon ha!  Therefore this is my work and at this level and it would be a disservice to myself if I didn't acknowledge and celebrate it, despite any negative peer judgements it may bring.  I'm being brave and bold by pursuing this accreditation.  I am sure many others know that our strategic value as learning technologists is often misunderstood or ignored.  This certification is further proof that learning technologist-type roles bring pedagogical value than just the technological solution.  Of which many of these types of roles have also achieved this accreditation.  Moreover, if I'm doing this level of work, I'm doing it.  Hence why I didn't use the Fellowship Category Tool, as I know what my work impact reach is and where I am going.   I've an equal right to validating my professional development.  It's a fact I go above and beyond in my roles, and evidenced in my current role.  Therefore it shouldn't be a surprise I am able to demonstrate my work at this level.  I will proudly wave the flag to inspire others in similar roles.  Like I said in 'What working class means to me'; "The more I reflect on my journey the more important it is becoming in this space.  The more personal and workplace adversity I experience the more I will channel it positively as an advocate.  I think a main big reason for achieving Principal Fellowship is to prove that proper working class individuals like me can achieve such things.  I want to obtain and use it as a torch to support others like me, especially true working class individuals."

So why wait for later when I can press on?  I had a clear plan to obtain PFHEA whilst in this role and scaffold some activities around that.  It wasn't too much of a slog, as I had done the work associated with those activities and in most case studies I had existing, and re-purposed SFHEA material and evidence.  But mostly adding further naturally occurring and timely conversations and asking to capture in writing, and developing evidence of impact.  Not disguising evidence collection through creative language, i.e. getting it from people without being honest about the actual intentions.

I quietly started developing ideas in early September 2023, and had established an appropriate narrative by October 2023.  I had a clear idea of the case studies I wanted to use as I knew the strategic impact I wanted to focus on and showcase.  So I found it easier doing Record of Strategic Educational Impact (RSEI) at the end by breaking down the activity milestones.

I attended a Principal Fellowship kickstarter on 1 December 2023, based on the new Professional Standards Framework 2023.  With the aim of submitting for February 2025 deadline.  Like the process, I have my own goals and timelines that I want to adhere to, which are non-negotiable  as I don't want to be steered by others needs.  I have my own goals and timescales and I don't want to delay it.  However, through a conversation I had with the designated Professional Recognition Scheme team, it seems I wasn't event part of the newly designed capped cohorts.  I was accepted into the current cohort, but they plan to take their first PFHEA applications against the new PSF 2023 in February 2025 - which takes me back to my original goal.  As with these things though, I have to anticipate I will not pass first time and much feedback to action will be required.  It could be another lengthy process of going back and forth.  Official production began between January-February 2024 inputting the initial case study content.  Initially for the written application pathway, but in April I became aware of the Professional Conversation pathway and opted for that.  A welcome option that appealed to me to reflect openly via a conversation.  From March-April 2024 I was modifying and trimming to suit.  May-onwards rewriting and refining due to a change in focus on some case studies and refining my evidence.  By beginning of November I had received all of my advocate statements.

In the Autumn I received some feedback from the scheme team of needing deeper impact on students.  So I could wait a bit longer for capturing further evidence and impact on my strategic work.  The sustained aspect was the main issue, due to the shorter dates in my Record of Strategic Educational Impact (RSEI), where I broke down the case study and presented as a coherent journey.  But I pushed back and said if I'm doing the work, demonstrating that ability and having the intended impact then that's what should count over a couple shorter dates in the RSEI.  Basing just on dates in my view is not showing sustainability, but actions of my abilities are.  However creative suggestions were given on this.  We later agreed to also bring in my PebblePad work.  I was also assigned a mentor, receiving initial helpful feedback, until they went on leave and I went independent again.

Eventually in December 2024, I decided to do the written application and submit for June 2025.  Reflective writing is one of my strengths anyway.  It was odd I was considering the professional conversation.  It would also be more beneficial for me to utilise my reflective writing abilities, include further detail than I wouldn't have been able to in the professional conversation outlines, and in the long-term it provides a better format for me to reflect and use the text produced in it.  Plus less planning around the conversational route.  In the second week of January 2025, my narrative came into actual focus and clarity.  Luckily as I had previously attempted the written pathway, I had a good foundation of material to rework and refine for my application.  Though I was delayed again to Summer 2026 due to me working on my PGCLTHE at the same time, which I wasn't made aware of previously.  As a result, I was offered February 2026, of which I accepted.  I then spent from September 2025 to January 2026 refining my submission.

I need to remind myself it's a marathon not a sprint.  Finding a little bit of joy of being in the position to work towards such thing.  Reminding myself of the enjoyment and value of my role and tasks, and not getting lost in the rat race of self importance and being superior to others.

What follows might be contentious, however, this is my personal lived experience, not naivety.  Is my hope it inspires much hope and reflection in others.  And to be clear, there are many academics that do involve, collaborate and value me.  However, there is still an imbalance with how my role is perceived.

Fear and anxiety

As with the scheme, I should be able to get some benefit out of the process not just credentials.  I felt it was more of a proving exercise than cathartic.  Perhaps this was because I know I'm doing this level of work and the impact I am having and hoping to make.  The biggest learning experience for me was going deeper on this impact and articulating it in a way that satisfies the criteria.  These accreditations are originally designed more for academics than professional services, even though attempts to have been made to make fellowships more accessible and cohesive.  They still expect the same writing style, detail and format which is not a natural fit for non-academic contract roles.  I find it stressful trying to write the way they wanted me to write and articulate, and it does make them somewhat inaccessible even if I am doing the demonstrable work.  I still think these things should be more portfolio-based.  Whilst they accept minimal screenshots, having more of them supports the discussion and reflection of evidence much better.  Rather than fully relying on the assessment of creatively convincing language and potentially abusing academic integrity.  I was conscious not to make it feel like a driving test; being taught how to pass it - again I needed to get a benefit out of doing it.  But I guess to some extent it does depend on what type of reviewer is assigned.  As whilst there is set criteria, they will most likely have areas of focus and interest depending on their own expertise.  The process has made me realise the huge amounts of high-level work and positive impact I have made during my employment at NTU.  As a result, I'd like to think that I am a respected individual and stakeholder in digital education in and beyond at NTU.  The PFHEA process allowed me to focus on my journey and analyse the quality of my impact; why I am doing what I'm doing.

As I started writing, I felt a bit of anxiety and self-judgement that I may be coming across arrogant in my application.  Which I don't think I do as it is not naturally me, I am far too modest for that.  So I had to push myself to say that well yes I am doing all these higher-level things.  The use of language and being succinct to points was definitely my main challenge.  As I can be very literal and objective, which it needs to be sometimes, when my academic language could take more prominence.

Clearly this is still a current topic and affects many people in my context, therefore what follows are my open thoughts on the matter.  I stealthily worked on this in the background as I found it quite uncomfortable making it known.  The fact that I am talking about my work at this level - because it is at this level, I have actually done/doing the work at this level and I'm literal about it.  However, a part of me that can't comprehend the level of this work I do, given my poor educational beginnings.  I appreciate on the outside that I appear an unconventional PFHEA candidate.  Of which I feel might be seen as controversial and may bring unnecessary academic offence and judgement against me.  Which may stir a bit of jealousy and anger in others, causing me much anxiety.  Perhaps this stems from the direct and in-direct academic perception that I am not on a teaching contract.  Especially as some organisational cultures might depict which roles/who can and cannot work towards such accreditations, making it even more challenging for professional services colleagues to achieve.

I am contractually defined as professional services though I am an academic and undertake much scholarly work.  Strongly synthesising much educational technology, digital learning design and digital literacies literature.  Though I am often designated a technical support label, and therefore my academic and pedagogical value can be disregarded by some.  Despite digital being in my title provoking technical stereotypes.  I discuss more of this in my teaching philosophy formative assessment and reflective summative piece of my PGCLTHE.  In my personal opinion, schemes of this kind could have been originally created to express superiority, individually and organisationally.  However, the increased widespread accessibility of them has made them less so.  However, I do feel some purists and organisations like to protect and preserve the originality.  Though I am not always convinced others' clearly know what is being protected or preserved.  Perhaps fear of particular role types is downgrading the quality of their interpretation of the fellowship process?  When I started telling some academic colleagues I am working towards it, their first reaction is not immediately positive and supportive, but more so off-putting language.  Firstly, yes it is ok to make a realistic comment, but a more encouraging and supportive response would be welcomed.  Secondly, are they focusing on their role and experience.  It is not role-focused but the level of work I do in it.  I sense hidden negative role/contract perceptions and gatekeeping behaviours.  I experienced something similar when asking to do Postgraduate Certificate in Learning and Teaching in Higher Education (PGCLTHE), there was hesitancy in language of should I be doing it in my professional services role.  When I read body language this also confirms it.  Actually, when I was doing my PGCLTHE I experienced what I interpreted as role type/contractual perception.  Yes teaching contracts are a key identifier, but I don't think they are the only thing that should define someone's abilities.  If I were to be switched to an a teaching contract as I am now.  To what extent would that change others perceptions?  How different would I be treated?

Education is often celebrated for being made accessible to all, however such systems and schemes like this can be susceptible to becoming exclusive.  Which might not align ethically with academic integrity principles.  The realism, and my own lived experience through multi-disciplinary collaboration and partnership with academics, I do contribute to successful high quality Higher Education learning, teaching and the student experience.  Therefore, it doesn't just rely on academic-only roles.  Fellowships in particular require evidence of collaboration with colleagues, however, in my experience there is lack of consideration for stakeholder involvement.  I believe myself to operate in a ecosystem in the web of life.  Not as a solo egotistic individual that is superior to others.  A learning technologist can have a focus on academia, and I have that and I am academic.  I am soon to achieve my PGCLTHE, which makes me a qualified academic professional in HE.  It was very clear that I am already doing this as part of my current role, and I did not have to consider alternatives or undertake extra work to make up for it.

Some might argue that achieving a fellowship does not make an individual academic.  But my position on it is that if they have or are doing the work that is specified in the academic criteria and therefore successfully demonstrating this, then they are.  I see the point that I am not on a teaching/academic/research contract then I might not be defined as academic.  However, undertaking academic and scholarly work, whether fully or partial to my role, and is supported by being demonstrated successfully through academic criteria laid out in the PGCLTHE qualification I am completing or a fellowship, proves this.  This is besides the argument that I have previously completed Higher Education.  Conversely, some may teach, undertake scholarship and research but might not embody and appreciate what it means to be in those roles.

Whilst about SFHEA, this article by Advance HE gave me reassurance; 'A non-academic’s journey to achieving the Senior Fellowship'.  Often a misconception that these accreditations are for academic/teaching-only roles, when that is not stated by Advance HE.  Some University's interpret the criteria more narrowly.  However, as Advance HE state for PFHEA, it is not role or title dependent, though some purist academics may prefer specific roles and rank before making an application.  Meaning, as I said in my blog post 'Achieving SFHEA and SCMALT'; "I believe that if you are doing the work and not in the assumed designated role I.e. in a senior or managerial role, but can provide required and adequate evidence.  Why not make an application?  The accreditations are there to be claimed.".  As it is stated, treat the application as a claim.

Some might view that these fellowships have become easy.  I'd disagree and say they've got too stuck in their rigid structures and formats.  I think early achievers had it easier before they became too complex, perhaps due to early achievers iterating it and becoming harder - as most schemes like this are, along with educational programmes.  And internal scheme team leads will have a different vision that they want to implement.  In general there should be more parity across learning technologist type roles as we encourage, enable, and convince academics to develop and apply their digital and innovative approaches beyond their current practices.  Especially in those where this does not come natural or generally resist change.

Whilst the external comments below are in response to the National Teaching Fellowship Scheme (NTFS), their perspectives resonate with me.

Puiyin Wong, an influential figure and advocate for learning technologist roles - "The issue I am seeing and indeed fighting a lose battle is that Advance HE isn’t making any recommendation directed to accredited institutions to give these groups a fair chance.  Time and time again, so so many stories of colleagues who fall in one of more of these groups are simply denied the opportunity regardless how ready and/or good we are.  The NTFS say contribution to teaching, no where does it say only in teaching, yet so so many universities choose to interpret the criteria in the most narrow way imaginable, effectively robbing so so many their opportunities.  Someone once said to me, getting their NTF (post nomination) was way easier than trying to fight internal politics and prove their worth and to everyone nominated.  It shouldn’t be like this, it should be fair chance for anyone regardless of contract type or any background, if you are good enough, you are good enough.  If you are not, even you might be a senior academic, you should not stand in the way of others."

Santanu Vasant - "I agree with your points Puiyin, some institutions do have barriers to apply, but having supported NTFS in a few Universities, it is open to all as Dr Mark Ingham NTF SFHEA says. Just like wider reward and recognition such as promotions excluding professional services staff who are supporting learning and teaching, it's an institutional decision."

John Brindle - "It’s really interesting how undervalued PS staff can be in institutions, it’s really easy to get sidelined or cut out of conversations where you can add value, or to be cut out of research and recognition opportunities. I’ve experienced both of these in the past, most institutions must do better to acknowledge PS staff and work with them to create fantastic student experiences. 

100% of staff in an institution contribute to the student experience."

These external perspective comment extracts again demonstrate similar perceived barriers, and support the part reason why I am doing PGCLTHE - bolstering and improved credibility.

Puiyin Wong - "...This story is exactly what’s wrong with academia, the upstairs/downstairs culture stinks. Often, as PS staff, we are undermined, not respected accordingly and our academic/scholarly abilities disregarded. This is exactly the reason why, whenever possible, I use all of my post nominals; they are the little things that show, I too, have as much, if not more academic ability compared to my teaching colleagues."

Santanu Vasant - "There are several mutual ex-colleagues Puiyin, who use the phrase "gatekeepers" and your post reminds me of this. There is indeed a lot of them and us in academia, repilicating what happens in society. Sadly it's happening more and being supported my people and allowed to continue. I once had a old colleague (who had been a Dean years ago) when I first became a Learning Technologist who told myself and referred to 2 other colleagues, a junior research assistant and a web editor as not being important because we were just professional services staff. The junior research assistant is a Deputy Vice Chancellor and the Web Editor is a Dean of a Business School, they both do have PhDs etc. As a Hindu priest once said to me "it's not where you start, it's where you finish in life that's important". We shouldn't have to prove anything, the way we are, the chances we give and the way we interact with our colleagues should be what we are respected for. Everything else is just performative BS." 

Evan Dickinson - "I can only echo your view that often PS staff are not recognised for the full value of what we can bring to the table. I use my post-nominals for the same reason. It's also why I have written and will continue to publish and advocate for the wider skillsets and knowledge that many of us in the ed tech professional services space have. If you only knew some of the insults I have heard over 30 years in HE. They've given me a thick skin, taught me to know my self worth and not to just accept things from those who should know better."

EDIT:  In June 2026.  I saw an external post from a senior lecturer, who holds SFHEA and oversees an institutional fellowship scheme; "Since January I've been in two leadership development programmes;...course leadership micro credential and Advance HE Aurora. In both, I've struggled to articulate what my approach to leadership actually is - partly because I don't recognise myself as a leader! It wasn't until I was sat in the...Annual Learning and Teaching conference listening to...talk about the relationship between teaching and leading that the penny dropped - teaching is leading!

With that profound revelation (for me at least) I've approached today's Aurora event with a very different thought: if teaching is leading, how can I use my teacher identity to inform my leader identity?..."

What struck me was that my understanding of SFHEA has always been that applicants demonstrate and evidence leadership activity through their current practice.  This made me reflect on the distinction between undertaking leadership and consciously identifying as a leader.  Perhaps you can lead without identifying as an actual leader, and thus meeting the accreditation criteria and developing and deepening connection and identity to leadership later on.  However, this raises parity issues, especially with the experiences of professional services contract colleagues who are already finding it challenging to articulate and evidence leadership, and whom might be leading.  If experienced academic colleagues can experience this, then perhaps academia can explore more broader and inclusive understandings and practices of leadership across HE.

The application

As with my SFHEA, again my case studies are not a greatest hits, but focused on what appropriate evidence I have to support the requirements.  What's different in focus on my case studies is that SFHEA was more based on things I lead on within situated areas.  Whereas with PFHEA I discuss things beyond my immediate areas that are university-wide and impact beyond it.

The pathway I was working through consists of the following and provides a really effective framework and process to reflect on my work and contributions.

• Context and leadership statement (up to 500 words, not assessed)
• RSEI (10 x 25 words)
• Outline of three (or four) case studies evidencing my effective and inclusive strategic leadership and that includes quantitative and qualitative data (7,000 words)
• Reference list of cited work
• Advocate statements verifying and endorsing my application (three, two internal and one external)

I worked to the three Descriptor 4 criteria statements:

• D4.1: Sustained and effective strategic leadership of higher education practice, with extensive impact on high-quality learning: within or beyond an institution, or across a discipline or profession
• D4.2: Development and implementation of effective and inclusive: strategies, or policies, or procedures, or initiatives, to enhance practice and outcomes for learners
• D4.3: Active commitment to, and integration of, all Dimensions in the strategic leadership of academic or professional practices

I had to have three advocate statements to support my application.  Below are what colleagues wrote.

Dr Lucian Milasan, Senior Lecturer in mental health nursing:

Professor Jayne Brown, Professor of Health Care Professions:

Colette Fuller, Digital Education Manager: