There's been a beautiful awakening. 👂💫... Here's a little story of me journeying into something new but familiar.
I'm not going to cover old ground, so I will keep it short by saying I have been interested in spirituality/spiritualism stuff since I was really young, but I didn't know how to make sense or work with it, but eventually found my way through my interest in crystals (gem stones), animal spirit cards and mediumship stuff - ooh spooky! 👻 I'm teasing, some folk get a little weirded out/don't believe things they can't see and touch, my partner Gary included. 😉 Even though Shamanism is supported and being evidenced by modern neuroscientific understandings. Unfortunately many categorise spirituality as a religion, when really it's an innate element as present in many sentient beings. Maybe that's another reason why it resonated with me, is that it's because it's part of our natural human psyche. In essence its just heightening our awareness to connect to that higher level within us. Therefore many feel they have to steer away from it, when really this is what many humans need - interconnectedness. It's broadly in the national curriculum and apprenticeship standards that have specific criteria to develop and nurture the mind, body and spirit in learners... The pandemic has surely brought this to the forefront for many. Everyone's having more time to stop and reflect. Plus its allowed them to hear those inner thoughts and voices, which might have been otherwise too noisy to hear before. Just let them be heard and allow whatever emotions and thoughts arise from them, it's your inner self connecting with you.
Following a sense of purpose
I'm pretty sure this was back in early 2016 (my memory is impeccable - especially with years as my friends and family will know) whilst New Year sale shopping in Leeds. Me and Gary visited Waterstones and I came across the book 'Follow the Shaman's Call: An Ancient Path for Modern Lives' by Mike Williams. Oddly, I just felt drawn to it with no reason to get into it at that time. I bought it anyway though as like most of my books, I am drawn to them and as always they prove their propose later on in life, i.e. not picking up to read until the need to arrives.
Shamanism in a very basic explanation, is an indigenous ancient practice working with spiritual energy/spirit world and the natural world to use in our present physical world, for healing purposes. A modern form of this is 'Movement Medicine' in which I am learning. Uses kinaesthetic, emotional intelligence and psychosynthesis, it is about creating an experiential and embodied connectedness with yourself and the world we live in - more later. This speaks to me as it doesn't rely on faith but allows you to learn from direct experience in which you turn into wisdom. Which chimes with my passion for lifelong learning, reflection and supporting and encouraging others to be best they can be. I'm a lifelong learner and I enjoy learning new things that develop and realise my journey and character. Unfortunately, in ancient history, romans and the establishment of Christians horrifically wiped out the majority of Shamans or those that connected to the divine, perhaps witches too. Due to them introducing/imposing a religion, the bible etc, that was purposefully designed to be at opposites with Shamanism and everything else deemed other-worldly, so they decided to slaughter them. Furthermore, this eventually creeped into education and eventually our human psyche. Resulting in many being taught or influenced through upbringing to hide any difference from the 'the norm' and natural connection to divine, that was seen as the work of the devil etc. But not all we're decimated, some survived. As here I am learning and practicing it many years later like so many others have been doing, from those that passed it down from their ancestors.
I'm not trying to pigeonhole myself in something because I am lost and need to be found (nothing wrong with that if you are - been there many times) or looking to something 'bigger' for an answer - as all answers are within us if we open our minds and hearts and listen and connect through ourselves. Visualise it loosely like the Na'vi in Avatar (2009) movie. I'm following a sense of purpose, not a particular need. It's long been a calling in which I feel I have finally understood. Connecting all dots over the years and the 'coincidences' experienced and the ever reoccurring number 22, in which I have been seeing more often. This also connects to my passion for natural history and curiosity of the 'Great Mystery', in which I occasionally receive ethereal visions ask myself strange questions about our existence.
From what I have read upon, Shamans are awakened through some kind of trauma or near death experience. I've not had any significant traumas but did have a near-fatal car accident on the 10 October 2010. Though I can't say my life changed following the experience and that clearly didn't feel like an awakening. However, as a young un' I had a poor start to education, struggled to identify who I was as a person, as in articulating and expressing myself and what my purpose was. As well as learning to enjoy my own company and dealing with loneliness (and rejection) when I lived on my own for 7 years. However I feel my purpose has become more evident over the years, but personally I think I've only just begun to surface it. Perhaps my unsettled earlier life, discovering who I am and the lessons have paved the way for a subtle kind of initiation? EDIT: Or it may be that I need an 'official initiation', akin to what I experienced with 'Hold the man' in September 2022.
Following the signs
Anyway... Around mid November 2020 when watching some hypnotherapy videos (out of interest), I then started searching randomly on Shamanic practices on YouTube. Feeling a sense of connection and peace, I felt curious of getting into this. I even commented to say that it would feel homely doing this sort of thing and should get involved in this as my main hobby and downtime, i.e. offline/not technology related. However, in some of the videos they were in the traditional indigenous attire, which you don't have to wear, as the modern form Movement Medicine doesn't prescribe it - challenging cultural appropriation.
Nearing Christmas, I said to Gary that he could get me a Shamanic instrument to practice some dancing and drumming etc. Later when Christmas shopping in the Nottingham City, me and Gary popped into Waterstones and as always, I had a peek at the spirituality section. And there was this book called 'Shaman: Invoking Power, Presence and Purpose at the Core of Who You Are' by Ya'Acov Darling Khan, whom I have never heard of before but I felt drawn to it, like it spoke to me - it found me. Which Gary later got me as a Christmas present along with a very cool wooden rattle to practice shaking with the primal music. Moving on... Being a devoted pop music fan, just before Christmas I became aware of Leann Rimes' new album CHANT - not a huge fan but do own some of her albums. Different from her typical music, defined as a meditation album, I was intrigued about the concept and recording process which I read up on. I liked the sound and the chant style which grew on me. Later she released the song 'Throw My Arms Around The World' which has a very indigenous sound and heartening lyrics. After these events it all moved very quickly. Over Christmas I was reading the Shaman book and really connected to what it is and stands for, as well as resonating with my own values. Another enlightening aspect is that it allows me to integrate Shamanism/Movement Medicine into my existing lifestyle, without it suggesting I remove current beliefs and practices. Once I got into reading the book, spiritually I felt I was where I was meant to be, I had finally reached a path that I had been curiously trying to uncover over many years. So I am just going to enjoy immersing myself in this and go with it, see where it leads me. I joined the Movement Medicine Facebook community group and signed up to their website 21 Gratitudes. Unusually on a Saturday night before bed, I found myself watching a TEDx Talks YouTube video on eLearning. Unknowingly it had strong references to primal learning, I.e. storytelling and exchanging knowledge via cave drawings - I feel this was another subtle sign.
